5 Self-Care Techniques for Adults with ADHD

ADHD (Attention Deficit and Hyperactivity Disorder) affects a significant proportion of the adult population, with more individuals seeking out a diagnosis and understanding. In addition to symptoms of hyperactivity, impulsivity, and inattention, research has also explored ADHD and the connection between certain emotional and cognitive factors, such as higher emotional reactivity, negative thinking patterns, and co-existing conditions, such as anxiety and depression. 

Neglecting self-care practices for adults with ADHD can be easy to do, but it might be the most important thing you can do for your mental well-being to help you manage symptoms, reduce stress, and improve your overall well-being. Let's look at these carefully tailored five self-care techniques for adults with ADHD, providing practical ways to maintain balance and daily functioning. 

1. Recognising your thought patterns through journaling 

ADHD affects thinking, such as focusing more on negative thinking patterns, which may leave you feeling self-doubt, self-criticism, moments of failure, and low self-esteem. Through journaling, your brain will start slowing down, helping you identify when these thoughts arise, how they may affect your mood, and how to process emotions more effectively. You can challenge these thoughts by being curious about where they come from and whether they are true. Thoughts can then be reframed to something more positive. Even if it's difficult to believe and feel these are first, working in such a way takes practice and consistency. 

If journaling doesn't work for you, I always encourage people to seek different mediums, such as art-making, music-making, or poetry. Whatever feels more accessible to you, go with that. Be kind to yourself throughout the process and seek further support if needed. 

2. Understanding hyperfocus

Hyperfocus is a fixation on an activity for a prolonged period without taking any breaks, losing track of time, and neglecting eating and sleeping, usually engaging in an activity you are interested in. Hyperfocus can deplete your energy and leave you exhausted by its end. Low dopamine levels in the brain are hypothesised to play a role in hyperfocus. Due to this, it can be challenging to get yourself out of the intense focus. Although it can be an excellent asset, it can also decrease productivity and impact your relationships and academic achievements. Recognising your hyperfocus can help you set timers and alarms when working on tasks and use other external cues to manage your time more effectively. 

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Arula Counselling integrates creative, psychodynamic, mindfulness and ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy) approaches with a focus on neurodiversity-affirming and trauma-informed care. 

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3. Listening to music that makes you feel good   

Music can significantly increase dopamine in your brain, regulating emotions and offering structure to your day. The rhythm and tempo of songs support attention, focus, and decision-making. You can also use music to complete tasks due to the nature of the length of songs and tracks. It can start by structuring your brushing your teeth in the morning by playing a 2-3 minute upbeat song. Experiment with genres, speed, and instrumentation, and notice how different songs make you feel. Instrumental music may be more supportive due to not having instant associations with the music and lyrics. However, lyrics can be powerful in focusing on one specific mood or situation. Just notice how different tracks and songs make you feel. 

4. Finding the right support network

Building a solid support network is essential for individuals with ADHD. Seek out people who understand and empathise with your experiences; it might be someone you know of having the same condition. Talking to people who understand you can be helpful and healing, as well as being heard and validated and feeling like you're not alone in your experiences. Surrounding yourself with a supportive community can provide validation, understanding, and practical strategies for managing ADHD symptoms. Sharing your challenges and successes with others who can relate can be immensely beneficial. It can start with your family, friends, or someone from work with whom you connect and feel safe. It can start from just one person. 

5. Self-Compassion

Practicing self-compassion is crucial for individuals with ADHD. Understand that ADHD is a neurodevelopmental condition and that your symptoms do not define you. ADHD is just one part of you. Be patient and kind to yourself, recognising that you are doing your best. When setbacks occur, offer yourself understanding and forgiveness. Listen to how you speak to yourself, and notice to treat yourself with the same compassion and kindness you would extend to a friend facing similar challenges.

Conclusion

Self-care is crucial to adults with ADHD to help manage symptoms, reduce stress, and improve their mental and physical well-being. By incorporating these five self-care techniques into your daily living through journaling, understanding hyperfocus, listening to music to structure tasks, and boosting cognition, finding the right support network, and practicing self-compassion, you will start to understand yourself better and live a more balanced life. Remember that self-care is a personal journey that looks different for everyone, so explore and experiment with different strategies to find what works best for you. 

If you need more support in your process or have any questions regarding how therapy could support you, I look forward to connecting with you. 

References

Hamdani, S. (2023) Self-Care for People with ADHD. Simon & Schuster.

Nuff, K. (2024) Self-compassion. Available at: https://self-compassion.org/. (Accessed: 15 February 2024).

Volkow, N. D., Wang, G. J., Newcorn, J. H., Kollins, S. H., Wigal, T. L., Telang, F., ... & Swanson, J. M. (2011). Motivation deficit in ADHD is associated with dysfunction of the dopamine reward pathway. Molecular psychiatry, 16(11), 1147-1154. doi: 10.1038/mp.2010.97

7 Things to Know About Me as Your Counsellor

1. A shared journey

I work collaboratively with my clients, believing we are co-travellers on your journey. You are the expert on your life and I strive to understand your experiences from your perspective with deep empathy. You deserve to have full autonomy in your counselling, and how you’d like these to be structured. I bring in my own experiences, perspectives, and insights to the counselling process, primarily practicing from these three approaches: 

Psychodynamic counselling

Using a psychodynamic approach helps to get deeper into why some things may feel familiar to you, and work towards bringing these unconscious patterns to consciousness. This approach is less focused on the ‘problem’ and rather being curious about your ways of relating. 

Feminist counselling

I practice from a feminist framework, working within a sociopolitical context. In sessions, I prioritise your voice and support you in creating awareness of how social and cultural contexts are contributing to our therapeutic relationship and the external circumstances of your life. I create a pathway towards healing and empowerment within a socially conscious counselling environment. 

Creative arts therapy

Creative arts therapy recognises that not all emotions can be expressed verbally. This approach is focused on the connection of the mind and body and the felt sense of your experiences. It promotes self-awareness, self-expression, and personal growth. It is a process-focused approach where no previous musical or artistic skills are necessary.

2. Less about finding ‘solutions’ or ‘fixing’

You are not ‘broken’ and need to be ‘fixed’! Your emotions are a natural part of the human experience, even the painful ones. Our society today tends to be pathologising ‘mental health conditions’ that are focused on treating ‘symptoms’ rather than working out the root of the pain and suffering. Digging deeper and finding out insights about yourself can feel SO empowering!

3. Play as an integral part of connection 

Play allows us to interact with others and ourselves in a more spontaneous, authentic, and less guarded way. It often involves the suspension of rigid social rules and expectations, giving way to deeper connections beyond language and cultural differences. Incorporating play allows more room for empathy, shared experiences, self-expression, and emotional regulation. 

4. The counselling relationship in itself can be healing 

Counselling can offer opportunities for corrective emotional experiences, where you can start to explore and experience healthy and supportive relationships that you may have been lacking in your past. This can help to heal old wounds and create new, healthier patterns of relating, which can be SO helpful towards creating a life for yourself that you deserve!

5. I care deeply for my clients

I care deeply about the well-being of my clients and feel a true desire to show up for you in a way that you need. If there is something I think you could benefit from, I always share these resources with you. I consider myself to be a warm, empathic, and genuine person and that’s how I aim to show up in sessions!

6. Bringing my personality to sessions

I don’t believe in ‘blank slates’ and I have found this unhelpful in my own therapy too. I am a human with so many things I have yet to figure out! My wish is to bring the same humanness to sessions by showing my personality, humour, and directness with compassion and sensitivity. I recognise that I too have my limitations, and I am always ready to admit when I don’t know something. I remain curious to work together towards an answer you need. 

7. Living in a way that works for you!

Counselling can be so helpful in figuring out what it is that YOU need. In our daily lives, we can be so overstimulated by other people’s assumptions, opinions and observations. Counselling offers a quiet space from where you can turn towards your inner voice and find out what it has been telling you all along. It’s okay not to have the answers but it may be time to start listening to it, and creating a life that truly resonates with you. 

I aim to keep advocating for counselling as I know how much value it has brought to me. My wish is to carry on sharing that with others. If this is something you are willing to give a go, then I look forward to connecting 🧡

How to Overcome Self-Doubt I 6 Steps to Find Your Confidence

Self-doubt may be standing in your way of personal growth and success. It can be holding you back, and I am no stranger to feeling this way. For me, personal therapy has helped hugely in overcoming my fears and doubts about my abilities. Therefore, I have compiled a list of six steps on how to overcome self-doubt that have helped me find self-confidence (which is still an ongoing process of learning with its highs and lows). I hope that these can support you and act as a starting point in the process of overcoming self-doubt, even if just a little bit. 

What is self-doubt?

Self-doubt is defined as a lack of confidence in one’s skills and abilities which can lead to feelings of incompetence, worthlessness, and unlovability, as well as difficulties in making decisions. It can further be intertwined with a fear of failure, judgement from others, fear of making mistakes.

This may interfere with your personal or professional relationships, and create a block in pursuing and achieving academic and professional goals. But it doesn’t have to be this way. 

How to overcome self-doubt

In this article we’ll cover how to overcome self-doubt and feel more confident in yourself. We’ll cover topics such as developing self-awareness, challenging your negative thoughts, setting manageable goals, finding positive support and taking action. However, it is important to be mindful that this process isn’t easy, so be kind to yourself when going through these. Let’s look at the six steps below. 

Step 1: Recognising and acknowledging your self-doubt

Awareness creates opening. Taking the time to reflect on your thoughts and feelings, and being mindful when self-doubt starts to creep in. Acknowledge, that it’s so common to have these thoughts and feelings and that you are not alone in feeling this way, that self-doubt is part of a human experience. By beginning to recognise these feelings, you can start taking back control, managing your thoughts and feelings in a more positive way. 

Step 2: Challenge your negative beliefs

Self-doubt stems from negative beliefs about yourself and your abilities. This may be related to your childhood and the false beliefs that others and perhaps yourself have been telling yourself. However, overcoming self-doubt does not mean removing these negative beliefs but rather recognising their presence. Take a pause and start to question whether these thoughts and beliefs are true or not. It is about finding more appropriate ways to support yourself, focusing on our strengths that you may have been looking past, recognising your achievements and reflecting on your achievements. 

Step 3: Set realistic goals and celebrate progress

Having goals that are too big may make you feel overwhelmed and like you’re never going to get there (if that’s even possible). Breaking down your goals into smaller, more manageable tasks is an effective way to address self-doubt. You can begin by writing these down and making a visual schedule for yourself. This will help you recognise your capabilities and the progress you’ve made, boosting your confidence and diminishing your self-doubt. Do what works for you and what makes you feel good. Give yourself credit! 

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Arula Counselling integrates creative, psychodynamic, mindfulness and ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy) approaches with a focus on neurodiversity-affirming and trauma-informed care. 

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Step 4: Surround yourself with positive influences

Our support network is of huge value on how to overcome self-doubt. To be able to lean onto the people that we trust and feel comfortable with will help you overcome self-doubt and give you strength as you’re moving through these challenges. Engage in conversations with people who believe in your abilities and can provide a strong support system. Furthermore, engaging in activities that make you feel good, whether it’s connecting with your interests, educating yourself on new topics or taking up a new hobby, can all be great ways to boost your confidence and inspire you to reach for your goals.  

Step 5: Take action and embrace failure as a learning opportunity

It can be scary to move through your fear. It might be (and probably is) the very last thing you’re interested in doing. However, with appropriate support and encouragement, it is possible. It is about accepting that failure is a natural part of the human experience, and you are not alone in facing it. Acknowledging that stepping through failure helps to build confidence, and act as an opportunity for growth. Mistakes will be a part of that, and that’s okay. Here is an article on resilience.

Step 6: Self-compassion

Most importantly, be kind to yourself through this process of uncovering the thought patterns and ways of being that have been with you for such a long time. Be patient and avoid rushing the process, showing yourself compassion. Allow yourself to experience and acknowledge the emotions that arise, giving them space. This can be either with your loved ones, with people you trust or by finding external support. Finding support is a sign of strength. You deserve to feel good.

How to overcome self-doubt with music therapy?

Music gives a form to our inner feelings that we might be struggling with to express verbally. Bruscia (1989) has indicated that in music therapy, musical experiences are used to restore, maintain and support the wellbeing of the client and to support you in helping to find resources and tools to resolve any difficulties that you may be dealing with and increase your potential for mental wellbeing. Furthermore, Boxill (1985) has expressed that in music therapy, creating musical experiences with the client can help restore, maintain and improve your psychological, mental and physiological health. 

• Research shows that self-selected relaxation music can significantly reduce anxiety and bring the client into a more relaxed state, lowering the levels of stress and anxiety.

• Because music is a means of non-verbal expression, it can create a supportive environment of play where tension is released, reducing stress and giving way to self-expression regardless of one’s skills and abilities.

• Music therapy goals are designed to provide emotional support, decrease stress and anxiety, increase self-esteem and self-confidence, and provide a medium for creative self-expression, providing the client with an opportunity for control and independence. 

Conclusion

This article has covered six steps on strategies on how to overcome self-doubt and boost confidence. Self-doubt is a common challenge that many people face, but it does not have to define who you are. By following and keeping in mind the steps, it is possible to overcome self-doubt and find peace and confidence in yourself. Throughout your process, remember that it takes courage, commitment and self-compassion to work through your challenges but that there is potential to discover your full potential and achieve success in your life. 

If you feel like you’re ready to dive deeper then I look forward to hearing from you.

References

Braslow, M. D. et al. (2012) ‘Self Doubt’ in Social and Personality Psychology Compass 6/6: 470–482, 10.1111/j.1751-9004.2012.0044.

Bruscia, K. E.  (1989) ‘Defining Music Therapy’. Philadelphia. PA: Barcelona Publishers. 

Cohen, R. L. (1999) ‘The effect of music therapy on the reduction of anxiety for myocardial infarction patients. Unpublished Master’s Thesis, Clarkson College.

Ming, S. WU (2002) ‘Effects of Music Therapy on Anxiety, Depression and Self-Esteem of Undergraduates’. In Psychologia, 45. pp. 104-114.