5 Self-Care Techniques for Adults with ADHD

ADHD (Attention Deficit and Hyperactivity Disorder) affects a significant proportion of the adult population, with more individuals seeking out a diagnosis and understanding. In addition to symptoms of hyperactivity, impulsivity, and inattention, research has also explored ADHD and the connection between certain emotional and cognitive factors, such as higher emotional reactivity, negative thinking patterns, and co-existing conditions, such as anxiety and depression. 

Neglecting self-care practices for adults with ADHD can be easy to do, but it might be the most important thing you can do for your mental well-being to help you manage symptoms, reduce stress, and improve your overall well-being. Let's look at these carefully tailored five self-care techniques for adults with ADHD, providing practical ways to maintain balance and daily functioning. 

1. Recognising your thought patterns through journaling 

ADHD affects thinking, such as focusing more on negative thinking patterns, which may leave you feeling self-doubt, self-criticism, moments of failure, and low self-esteem. Through journaling, your brain will start slowing down, helping you identify when these thoughts arise, how they may affect your mood, and how to process emotions more effectively. You can challenge these thoughts by being curious about where they come from and whether they are true. Thoughts can then be reframed to something more positive. Even if it's difficult to believe and feel these are first, working in such a way takes practice and consistency. 

If journaling doesn't work for you, I always encourage people to seek different mediums, such as art-making, music-making, or poetry. Whatever feels more accessible to you, go with that. Be kind to yourself throughout the process and seek further support if needed. 

2. Understanding hyperfocus

Hyperfocus is a fixation on an activity for a prolonged period without taking any breaks, losing track of time, and neglecting eating and sleeping, usually engaging in an activity you are interested in. Hyperfocus can deplete your energy and leave you exhausted by its end. Low dopamine levels in the brain are hypothesised to play a role in hyperfocus. Due to this, it can be challenging to get yourself out of the intense focus. Although it can be an excellent asset, it can also decrease productivity and impact your relationships and academic achievements. Recognising your hyperfocus can help you set timers and alarms when working on tasks and use other external cues to manage your time more effectively. 

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Arula Counselling integrates creative, psychodynamic, mindfulness and ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy) approaches with a focus on neurodiversity-affirming and trauma-informed care. 

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3. Listening to music that makes you feel good   

Music can significantly increase dopamine in your brain, regulating emotions and offering structure to your day. The rhythm and tempo of songs support attention, focus, and decision-making. You can also use music to complete tasks due to the nature of the length of songs and tracks. It can start by structuring your brushing your teeth in the morning by playing a 2-3 minute upbeat song. Experiment with genres, speed, and instrumentation, and notice how different songs make you feel. Instrumental music may be more supportive due to not having instant associations with the music and lyrics. However, lyrics can be powerful in focusing on one specific mood or situation. Just notice how different tracks and songs make you feel. 

4. Finding the right support network

Building a solid support network is essential for individuals with ADHD. Seek out people who understand and empathise with your experiences; it might be someone you know of having the same condition. Talking to people who understand you can be helpful and healing, as well as being heard and validated and feeling like you're not alone in your experiences. Surrounding yourself with a supportive community can provide validation, understanding, and practical strategies for managing ADHD symptoms. Sharing your challenges and successes with others who can relate can be immensely beneficial. It can start with your family, friends, or someone from work with whom you connect and feel safe. It can start from just one person. 

5. Self-Compassion

Practicing self-compassion is crucial for individuals with ADHD. Understand that ADHD is a neurodevelopmental condition and that your symptoms do not define you. ADHD is just one part of you. Be patient and kind to yourself, recognising that you are doing your best. When setbacks occur, offer yourself understanding and forgiveness. Listen to how you speak to yourself, and notice to treat yourself with the same compassion and kindness you would extend to a friend facing similar challenges.

Conclusion

Self-care is crucial to adults with ADHD to help manage symptoms, reduce stress, and improve their mental and physical well-being. By incorporating these five self-care techniques into your daily living through journaling, understanding hyperfocus, listening to music to structure tasks, and boosting cognition, finding the right support network, and practicing self-compassion, you will start to understand yourself better and live a more balanced life. Remember that self-care is a personal journey that looks different for everyone, so explore and experiment with different strategies to find what works best for you. 

If you need more support in your process or have any questions regarding how therapy could support you, I look forward to connecting with you. 

References

Hamdani, S. (2023) Self-Care for People with ADHD. Simon & Schuster.

Nuff, K. (2024) Self-compassion. Available at: https://self-compassion.org/. (Accessed: 15 February 2024).

Volkow, N. D., Wang, G. J., Newcorn, J. H., Kollins, S. H., Wigal, T. L., Telang, F., ... & Swanson, J. M. (2011). Motivation deficit in ADHD is associated with dysfunction of the dopamine reward pathway. Molecular psychiatry, 16(11), 1147-1154. doi: 10.1038/mp.2010.97

ADHD in Women

Originally, ADHD was thought to only affect children and persist into adulthood in some cases. Recent research shows that children do not “outgrow” their symptoms, but these are carried into adulthood. However, adult ADHD remains an undiagnosed and untreated population, especially in girls and women, which makes it difficult for women with ADHD to find appropriate support. Therefore, more education and awareness are needed for accurate diagnosis and treatment. Below we will discuss gender differences in ADHD, symptoms of ADHD and what can be done to treat ADHD symptoms in women. 

ADHD in adults

According to research, 2.5% of the adult population has ADHD. Adult ADHD symptoms interfere with relationships, school and work performance and lead to feelings of low self-esteem, self-confidence and sleep difficulties. From research, about 80% of adult ADHD occurs together with other mental health conditions such as depression and anxiety, substance use and personality disorders. 

ADHD and gender differences

In children, ADHD is diagnosed after a referral from caregivers or teachers. Boys are more likely to be referred for treatment since they present primarily with external symptoms such as hyperactivity, which is more noticeable to others. Conversely, females with ADHD are more likely to present with inattentive symptoms and internalise their difficulties. Equally, this leaves more time to develop coping strategies to mask core symptoms associated with ADHD. 

Girls meet diagnostic criteria for ADHD at just under half the rates of boys, which becomes closer to equal by adulthood. Due to undiagnosed and untreated ADHD, symptoms of stress, depression and anxiety can rise. 

Symptoms of hyperactivity-impulsivity

• extremely impatient

• irrational and impulsive acts without thinking of the consequences

• difficulties in waiting for their turn or waiting for the other person to finish their sentences

• frequently interrupting activities or conversations

Symptoms of inattention 

• not paying attention to details and making careless mistakes 

• gets bored easily when doing something that they are not interested in 

• jumping from one activity to the next without finishing 

• frequently daydreaming 

• slow in completing tasks

• difficulties in completing tasks on time

• doesn’t follow instructions

• avoids tasks that require mental concentration, such as puzzles or reading 

• slow information processing 

• misplaces things frequently 

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Arula Counselling integrates creative, psychodynamic, mindfulness and ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy) approaches with a focus on neurodiversity-affirming and trauma-informed care. 

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What causes ADHD? 

The cause of ADHD is unknown and depends on each individual’s circumstances, such as the environment and genetics. ADHD usually first appears between the ages of 3-6 but may be left unnoticed because of a proper lack of education and knowledge in those around children. 

How is ADHD diagnosed in women? 

ADHD is a chronic condition that does not go away but can be mediated with proper support, such as therapy and medication. This needs careful assessment and diagnosis since there is no one way to diagnose ADHD. If you think you may have ADHD, you can start to note down your symptoms. Consult your GP or a psychiatrist, or get help from a therapist to help you understand your symptoms. It is important to note that not all symptoms will be ADHD, which requires careful consideration from a medical professional to rule out other conditions. 

What are some ADHD symptoms in women? 

Girls are more likely to display inattention as the predominant symptom, which is more likely to carry into adulthood. Occurring symptoms in women can be mood and anxiety and personality disorders which accompany female ADHD. This would require a proper assessment and diagnosis for awareness and clarity, given that there is a high risk for self-harm in females with ADHD.

Some symptoms of ADHD in women can lead to unhealthy or dysfunctional relationships, poor attendance or productivity at work, low self-esteem and self-confidence and difficulties in getting tasks done. Some symptoms in women might be: 

• mood swings 

• sensitivity

• impulsivity

• chronic stress 

• disorganisation and keeping with the time 

• chronic procrastination 

• difficulties multitasking

• restlessness

• daydreaming and inattentiveness

• difficulties in money-management

• forgetfulness

ADHD support for women in Berlin

ADHD support will help you cope with the symptoms and better understand yourself and your needs. ADHD support, such as counselling and medication, allows you to alleviate symptoms and learn how to better manage these, leading to improved relationships, work performance, and quality of life. 

Counselling 

Talking and creating awareness of yourself can help you manage day-to-day activities and create structure. Coming up with a format that is needed specifically for your needs and assessing what works for you. This can vary greatly, depending on a case-by-case basis. 

Music therapy 

In addition to talking, music therapy can help access our inner resources through creative means since not everything can be expressed in words. Music can help to alleviate anxiety and find ease and understanding. Because music activates our whole brain, it can help to shut the wired brain off from interfering thoughts to focus on the present moment.

If you would like to get more information on ADHD support or would like to schedule a consultation call, get in touch with me below. I look forward to hearing from you.

Language: Sex and gender exist on a spectrum. The term “women” referred to in this article reflects the term assigned at birth. However, your gender identity may not align with this category.

Please note: This is for educational purposes only and is not to substitute a therapeutic relationship with a mental health professional. If you are in a mental health crisis, please call 112 or your country's crisis line, where professional mental health workers can help you.

References

Biederman, J. et al. (2002). Influence of gender on attention deficit hyperactivity disorder in children referred to a psychiatric clinic. American Journal of Psychiatry, 159, 36–42.

Davies, W. (2014). Sex differences in Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder: Candidate genetic and endocrine mechanisms. Frontiers in Neuroendocrinology, 35, 331-346.

Hinshaw, S. P. et al. (2021) Annual Research-Review: Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder in girls and women: underrepresentation, longitudinal processes, and key directions. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry.

Hinshaw, S.P., and Scheffler, R.M. (2014). The ADHD explosion: Myths, medication, money, and today’s push for performance. New York: Oxford University Press.

Katzman, M.A., Bilkey, T.S., Chokka, P.R. et al. Adult ADHD and comorbid disorders: clinical implications of a dimensional approach. BMC Psychiatry 17, 302 (2017). https://doi.org/10.1186/s12888-017-1463-3

Nerenberg, J. (2020) Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World that Wasn’t Designed for You. 

ADHD - Finding Peace in the Midst of Chaos

October is ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) Awareness Month. Therefore, we will discuss the symptoms of ADHD and focus more on ADHD in adults. How does ADHD influence us, what about getting assessed, and how can therapy support an adult diagnosed with ADHD? If you’re looking for ADHD support for adults in Berlin, here is how counselling can help.

What is ADHD? 

ADHD is one of the most common neurodevelopmental disorders in children and adolescents, with symptoms present in 3-10% of school children. ADHD is three times more common in boys than girls and is usually passed on into adulthood. However, diagnosing ADHD in adults is more difficult since they have learned to mask their symptoms. 

ADHD symptoms

ADHD is characterised by poor impulse control, difficulties concentrating, restlessness, fidgeting, tics, and hyperactivity. Dr Gabor Matè has stated that ADHD is not a disease, but a byproduct of not getting our attachment needs met in childhood. Genetic risk, metabolic diseases, immune disorders, infections, physical trauma, toxic environment and neglect may contribute to ADHD. It may be associated with other mental health conditions such as depression, anxiety, dyslexia, learning difficulties, developmental disorders, and speech and language disorders. 

Early childhood environment

For young children, there is a need for attention and emotional regulation, the importance of attuning to the child, being present with them and offering physical and emotional security. Children are more vulnerable to environmental stressors, sensitivity to the environment, and not being soothed when distressed. A stressful childhood environment with no consistency or predictability creates a lack of trust, possibly leading to zoning out or a 'freeze' response as a coping mechanism, making the pain more bearable. 

Moreover, schools or other systems we operate in may be trying to fit children with ADHD into society's norms, ignoring their needs that are different from the 'norm'. However difficult it may be for the teacher or other professional to attend to everyone's needs, it always comes a long way. Including parents or caregivers in treatment plans is equally important, offering the child the appropriate support for healthy development. 

ADHD in adults

Untreated ADHD can impair work performance, damage self-esteem and interfere with relationships. It can also reduce the chances of success and satisfaction in life, leading to substance misuse and distracting yourself with other activities rather than sitting with the pain. Studies show that the brain retains neuroplasticity throughout life. The brain continues to develop new pathways and synaptic connections to environmental stimuli. Meaning without the change in the environment, the brain cannot create new circuits of the mind relating to self and the world. Having ADHD doesn't mean there is a flaw in one's personality. There may be distress, loneliness and confusion that the adults may be unable to express. Separation of the mind and body, where the mind keeps wandering in another direction. Sometimes, the person can be highly interested in certain motivating activities. 

What can therapy offer for adults with ADHD?

Therapy offers a safe space to explore any difficult feelings or triggers. It allows you to explore your patterns and behaviours and make sense of your inner experience. It is important to note that a therapist is not qualified to assess you for ADHD but can guide and support you in your process. 

How can music therapy help with ADHD?

Oliver Sacks, neurologist and author of Musicophilia, has said: "Nothing activates the brain as extensively as music". Music helps to relieve tensions and express yourself through play. Sometimes, there is no need for words. Music has its own pulse, rhythm, breathing and movement. As music evokes different emotions, you start to gain clarity about the processes within yourself in a safe environment and by reflecting on your experiences with a therapist. 

This type of therapy involves cognitive, emotional and social processes. The treatment uses musical interventions to support concentration, self-expression and social skills where the relationship between client and therapist is at the centre of therapy. However, creative activities such as free improvisation, listening to music, songwriting, movement and art can be used alongside words. Through these activities, the therapist guides the client towards specific therapeutic goals. 

1. Providing structure

Providing a framework through regular weekly sessions creates predictability and safety that you may lack in your daily life. It forms a boundary from where you can start to explore your emotional and behavioural patterns with the therapist. The client's self-confidence and sense of achievement can be supported and enhanced through goal-oriented activities. 

2. Safety and self-expression

Feeling safe is vital for growth and healing. From this environment, you can start to understand yourself better. Moreover, self-expression is one of the core values in music therapy. Music is a way to express yourself and convey and understand your emotions. Sometimes, expressing yourself through non-verbal means is safer and more accessible than words, finding new ways of relating and having fun with it. Expressing yourself in a way that feels comfortable and right for you. 

3. Supporting focus

Playing music or other forms of self-expression supports attention skills, where we pay attention to the body and mind. Listening to music activates the whole brain compared to speaking. Purposefully playing a musical instrument, writing songs, singing or listening to music can help you concentrate better and help make new neural pathways in your brain. 

4. Supporting social skills

Music and the arts offer opportunities to support communication and find new ways of interacting. Creative activities help to communicate in a more accessible way where no words are needed since we don't all communicate in the same way. Making yourself heard, validated and accepted in a therapy space helps you implement these skills outside the therapeutic relationship. In therapy, looking at and understanding your parental relationships and family history helps to make sense of your experience and create awareness. 

Getting assessed for ADHD as an adult in Berlin 

ADHD assessment is done by a psychiatrist or professional with the appropriate qualifications. Getting a diagnosis can be a source of relief and helps to validate your experience. Although some people prefer not getting an assessment for ADHD because of stigma or personal reasons. However, a diagnosis will help you get the appropriate care you need and enable you to adapt your school or work environments according to your needs. 

Conclusion

Not everyone's brain works in the same way. Offering compassion, listening and being valued for who you are goes a long way. In addition to learning about your emotional and behavioural needs and patterns in therapy, we may also explore parental relationships and family history. It can be terrifying to sit with your mind but doing that in a safe and trusting space can make all the difference. 

Contact me here if you think you or your loved one would benefit from counselling or music therapy.

Please note: If you are in a severe crisis, thinking of hurting yourself or others, then call 112, and professional mental health workers will be able to help you. Arula Counselling is not designed to offer help in immediate mental health crises.